When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
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