no. you can't hotbox the world.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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