The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
