i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Randomize
