he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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