taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
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