How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
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