just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
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he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
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THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
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