Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
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