I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
