pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
