fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
