people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I think people are normalizing furries
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
