i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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