I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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