why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize