Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
