just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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