never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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