That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize