I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
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