Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
