Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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