We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
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