I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
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