Welp...herpes.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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