Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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