My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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