All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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