I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
