Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
