it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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