rhymes with "ouble enetration"
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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