And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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