she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
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Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
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Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
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