me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
do herpes really smell.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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