shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
