we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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