just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
