So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
