He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
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Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
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I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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