Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
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