just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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