hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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