I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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