No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
