i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
