Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize