I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
