im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Are we still banned from the library?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
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