i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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